A Blow to Our Hopes

Hello, dear friends! I'm Nailah Jones, and I'm eager to share my deeply personal story of resilience, hope, and transformation. As a 46-year-old wife of 20 years, I've been on a journey that's been filled with both disappointment and determination. For quite some time, I've been pursuing motherhood, and today, I'm ready to open up about my experiences.

For many of us, motherhood is a natural part of life. We dream of having children, sharing our lives with them, and watching them grow into incredible individuals. But what happens when reality doesn't meet our expectations? What happens when we face setbacks, disappointments, and fears that seem insurmountable?

I remember the excitement and anticipation of starting my family with my husband, Romaine. We were both on the same page, wanting to have 2 to 3 kids at most. We discussed the timing, and I'll be honest – I wanted to wait a few years before starting our family. But little did I know that the journey ahead would be filled with twists and turns.

One of the most memorable moments was when I thought I was pregnant months into our marriage. I was at work, and my menstrual cycle was late by at least a week or so. I called my friend Binti to bring me a pregnancy test, and let me tell you – I was that paranoid! Looking back, I wish the outcome had been different. But what was I so scared of?

As it turned out, the pregnancy test was negative, and I started taking birth control to avoid any future scares. But little did I know that the pill would cause some side effects in my body. My cycle became irregular, and eventually, the pill became ineffective. I stopped taking it and waited for the hormone to leave my body, thinking that once it did, my chances of getting pregnant would increase.

Four years passed, and I am now 31 years old. I was eager to start our family, and Romaine was more than ready to make it happen! We attended baby showers left and right, and it seemed like all my friends were having kids. I felt like I was next – that any day now, I'd be making the big announcement about our due date.

“But life had other plans” is what my perspective was at that time.

As we navigated the ups and downs of trying to conceive, we faced disappointments that tried to form into seeds of resentment within our marriage. It was a tough time, but lessons were learned.

I believe that there are others out there who have struggled with similar issues. Maybe you're still trying to conceive, like me or maybe you've given up hope. Whatever your journey may be, know that you're not alone.

In this blog series, I'll be sharing different aspects of my story and how I believe my newfound focus will produce the outcome that I have waited so long for. This time it’s different.

A lot has happened in the waiting room.

While waiting - Meditate on this: But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint” (Isa. 40:31)